


Like I Can

by allmylovesatonce



Category: The Mindy Project
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-09
Updated: 2015-06-09
Packaged: 2018-04-03 14:37:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,916
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4104502
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/allmylovesatonce/pseuds/allmylovesatonce
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Danny's thoughts from the sidelines of Mindy's relationships.<br/>Inspired by "Like I Can" by Sam Smith.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Like I Can

**_He could be a sinner…_ **

Danny never really thought about Josh. He was barely letting himself think about Mindy at that point. He had seen how Mindy fell apart at Tom’s wedding and for convenience and the practice, he didn’t want her to be falling apart over this guy either. Though maybe if she spent another night in jail, he could steal a few more of her patients.

But Danny never really cared about Josh. He knew basically nothing about the guy. What was there to dislike? At the same time, from the stories he’d heard, what was there to like? Mindy was always more than happy to talk about him. She had even declared that the two of them would host the office Christmas Party. Danny still didn’t care.

He felt neutral on Josh until the moment he saw Mindy’s face as the voicemail played through the room. He was cheating on her. It was so obvious. In an instant, Danny’s opinion of Josh changed. He was no longer neutral. He knew the sting of infidelity. He wouldn’t necessarily call Mindy his friend, but that didn’t mean he wanted her to feel this way. He could see the inevitable break down and he tried his best to keep it at bay. He’d said not to bring it up yet for the staff. He really meant not to do it for herself. Once it was out in the open, once it was confirmed, there was no going back. Danny knew that for a fact.

He watched Mindy run back up to her apartment, hell-bent on confronting Josh. “It’s not my problem,” he kept saying to himself. But as he hailed a cab, he knew he had the ability to stop her. And if he couldn’t stop her, he knew should be there to support her when it all blew up.

As he watched Josh’s other girlfriend destroy Mindy’s apartment, he couldn’t help but feel pity for Mindy. All she’d wanted was to host the perfect party with her perfect boyfriend. It seemed silly to him but it had certainly meant a lot to her. He knew that having all of this happen in front of her friends was actively wrecking her. How could it not be?

Everyone else was filing out of the party. Danny couldn’t make himself leave though. He had to check on her. She wanted him to leave but he couldn’t. He just wanted her to be okay. She was the most upbeat person in the office and yes, sometimes it was annoying, but seeing her so down was disorienting.

 It was sometime that night that he’d stopped looking at Mindy as just his coworker and seen her as a real person. He knew that he’d said some harsh things to her in the past, but as he sat on her bed looking at her, he realized he’d never want to be the reason she looked this depressed. He’d been this low before and even if it hadn’t been his fault tonight, he never wanted Mindy to be this low again.

By the end of the night, Jeremy was singing songs in Spanish and everyone was dancing and enjoying themselves the way they should have been all night. Mindy was dancing over by the window when she looked up to him and motioned him over to her. Danny felt relieved when he saw the grin spreading across her face as they danced together. He thought of the pact they’d made moments before. He’d been sure that she was going to ask him to marry her in five years. The scary thing was that in that moment if he’d thought it would make her happy, he probably would have agreed.

 

**_Or a gentleman…_ **

Charlie Lang was making her happy. The thought made Danny sick. It should have been him. He’d been a complete idiot to let her go. Granted, he knew that long before Charlie came into the picture and did nothing about it. He wasn’t completely convinced that he still wouldn’t ruin everything between them. Except now, there was nothing between them. They were colleagues. They were easing back into friendship. He’d have thought they were there if he hadn’t made the mistake of trying to kiss her again.

He wanted Mindy to be happy. He really did. The big problem was he wanted her to be happy with him. For a split second, he’d thought that if he just went for it again, she’d take him back. She was right to shut him down though. He’d been wrong. She deserved more. If he was going to win her back, he needed to do it in a way that she would appreciate. He needed to do it in a way she deserved.

The thing holding him back from doing just that was Charlie. Mindy was apparently dating him now. If Danny had just talked to her instead of impulsively trying to kiss her, maybe they wouldn’t be dating. The worst part was that Charlie is actually a good guy. Danny may have barely interacted with him, but he could tell. Plus he was from Staten. Danny felt uncomfortable trying to plot ways to get Mindy back when the guy she was with was clearly good for her. 

Danny could feel Mindy slipping further and further away from him. It was all his fault. Who could blame her for not wanting to spend time with the guy who dumped her? He missed her. He missed his friend but he also missed the feeling of holding her in his arms. He had to do something. Charlie may be good for Mindy, but Danny was convinced that given the second chance, he’d be better for her.

 

**_He could be a preacher when your soul is damned…_ **

From the moment Danny saw Casey, he wasn’t really impressed. He could tell Mindy was though and that bothered him. What was so special about this guy? He was a minister chanting that he hates God. After he told Mindy she was too selfish, Danny basically hated the guy. Mindy may be a bit selfish sometimes, but she was also a great person. It really annoyed him that this guy couldn’t see it.

But things continued with Casey anyway. Danny hoped he’d at least apologized for the things he’d said to her.  Things kept steadily progressing and all Mindy did was talk about him. Casey this and Casey that. Danny didn’t really want to examine why he was so annoyed by it all. But he was annoyed by it. He was annoyed that Casey tried to convert Mindy. He was annoyed that Casey was making out with Mindy in elevators. He was annoyed most of all that Casey was taking Mindy away from him for a year.

Danny and Mindy may not have always been the closest of friends, but lately they’d gotten quite close. Danny trusted and respected Mindy and he genuinely enjoyed the parts of his day that he got to spend with her. It wasn’t until Casey was dragging Mindy to Haiti that Danny really started to evaluate why he enjoyed his time with Mindy so much.

The first time he really started to think about why he disliked Casey so much had him coming up blank. He couldn’t put his finger on it. But the more often he thought about it, he realized what it was and it scared him. He realized that part of him (most of him) couldn’t like Casey because it seemed like he had a real future with Mindy. Danny kept trying to tell himself that it shouldn’t bother him, but it did. He couldn’t really admit it to himself yet, but he knew he valued Mindy for more than just her friendship.

Granted, not long after his revelation, Danny took Christina back. If he had stopped to think about it then, he might have realized he was driven to do it by Mindy’s relationship status. He was pretty positive that if Mindy had been single, he would have found a way to talk himself out of it, even if Mindy wasn’t an option yet.

He hated Casey the most the night in the doctors’ lounge. He was finally summoning the courage to do something about all the feelings that had been building up for Mindy. He briefly chickened out and claimed there was schmutz on her glasses. But after replacing her glasses, he couldn’t look away from her. She wasn’t looking away from him either. There was silence between them and it was urging Danny to make his move. He should have just done it and not given it a second thought. But as he was giving it the second thought, she told him that she’d gotten back together with Casey.

He didn’t think he was great about hiding his disappointment. As he fell back against the couch, he realized what that really meant. It meant he was losing Mindy for a year but also potentially for the rest of his life. When they came back and excitedly announced their engagement, it just confirmed what Danny had already counted on. It didn’t stop his stomach from dropping when he heard the news. It didn’t stop him from feeling like he’d lost his best friend.

He didn’t know why he talked Mindy into marrying Casey. She’d seemed so down when he found her out on her fire escape. That night just seemed bizarre. It was definitely not the makings of a wedding fit for Mindy Lahiri. That was for sure. But as he sat there with her, he didn’t give her the speech that could potentially convince her to leave Casey. She loved him. Or at least she thought she did. But she seemed happy with Casey. And as Danny sat there with her, he realized that all he wanted was for her to be happy.

He hated himself that part of him was relieved when she announced to everyone that they’d broken up. He could see she was miserable, but part of him couldn’t help but be hopeful that maybe he’d gotten his friend back, that maybe things weren’t out of the question for them. He still needed to heal and she certainly needed to as well. But maybe one day soon, they could figure out whatever it was between them. Surely it wasn’t just him who felt it.

****

**_He could be a lawyer on a witness stand, but he’ll never love you like I can, can…_ **

In hindsight, Mindy being with Cliff was his own damn fault. He’d given her the romantic gesture but when she actually seemed ready for it, Danny couldn’t deliver. As he watched her go on and on about Cliff, he’d tried his best to keep his disappointment to himself. When he worked out with Mindy, it was hard for him to keep his affection for her at bay. It was especially hard to deny he had feelings for her after seeing her naked twice.

Sitting on the sidelines and watching her be with Cliff was the worst for him of all her other relationships. He knew fully how much he wanted Mindy. He’d made the mistake of letting her get away. Classic Castellano move right there. At first he could see how happy Mindy was with Cliff. There was still the part of him that wanted her to be happy. There was a much bigger part that was becoming more prevalent within him though that didn’t care and wanted her to be with him instead.  
He tried to think of ways to move on. Mindy actually had potential with Cliff. Cliff was actually a pretty good guy too. Danny had even been friends with him at one point. The breaking point of that friendship was of course when Mindy revealed that Cliff was the one she liked instead of Danny. It seemed petty, but Danny couldn’t stand to be around the man without an insane burst of jealousy enveloping him. When he thought of all the different ways Cliff got to be with Mindy, it made Danny crazy. His feelings were taking over him and he was close to losing control of them.

When Mindy told him that Cliff was unsure about living with Mindy, Danny realized how much of an idiot Cliff was. He had the opportunity to prove his commitment to Mindy and he was blowing it. Danny was so desperate to have a relationship with Mindy he was pretty sure at that point he would probably agree to anything.

Then Mindy called him in tears because Cliff broke up with her. Danny was half tempted to just make a move then. Mindy deserved better though, so he assumed the role of best friend yet again. He couldn’t help it when he encouraged her not to run back to Cliff. She deserved better than someone who would leave her over a misunderstanding.

Danny needed her though. He could see her frustration rising with him every time he prevented her from getting back to Cliff. He tried to convince himself that he wasn’t doing it to keep her from getting back with him. He didn’t deserve her. Danny didn’t even know if he deserved her, but he at least wanted to show her he was an option. The jealousy he’d been bottling up burst out of him, resulting in him hurting her even more. The entire time they walked in silence, Danny was berating himself for yelling at her. It wasn’t her fault they weren’t together. It was his.

When she asked him for help writing the letter to win Cliff back, Danny couldn’t help but recite the words that had been playing in his head for months now. He willed her to look at him and realize he was talking about her. She didn’t though. She finished the letter, appreciating what a great _friend_ Danny was. It killed him. She left and the plane shook violently. As he looked over at her seat, he stopped caring about Cliff. It was now or never. She was going back to him unless Danny could give her a reason not to. As he walked back to the galley, that was exactly what he planned to do.

 

**_He could be a stranger you gave a second glance…_ **

It didn’t occur to Danny that he had any other reason to dislike the midwives than the fact that they were charlatans who were stealing their patients. They looked down on doctors. That was reason enough to dislike Brendan Deslaurier. He really never thought he had another reason to hate them. As he left the hospital on Mindy’s birthday though, he found another reason to hate Brendan.

He couldn’t even explain to himself why he felt so upset by seeing Mindy with Brendan. Mindy and he had been growing closer, sure, but they were only friends. Hell, he’d spent all night trying to win over one of her friends. The moment he saw her with Brendan though, he felt his stomach sink inexplicably. He stood there for a moment, transfixed by the thought of them together. He couldn’t really understand why it made him feel so ill.

He liked Mindy well enough now. He appreciated the ways she’d helped him out of problems. He knew she felt the same way toward him. But he certainly didn’t have feelings for her. Sure, he could tell sometimes he stared a bit longer when she wore certain outfits, but that was just him being male. He was disturbed by the near jealous impulses he was experiencing at seeing them together.

He didn’t bring it up. Why should he? Mindy’d probably lie about it anyway. But when he stood in front of her and cited all the dicks she dated, he couldn’t help but throw his knowledge of the two of them in her face. As he’d expected, Mindy lied about it.

When he brought Brendan back up at the party, he could see the wounded expression on Mindy’s face. As she explained that he treated her badly, Danny found yet another reason to hate Deslaurier. He may not feel anything for Mindy, he definitely didn’t, but who could treat her badly? Even at her most annoying, she was still a compassionate person. Deslaurier was an idiot. Danny would never change his mind about that.

 

**_He could be your trophy of a one night stand…_ **

Danny had been keeping to himself since he left Mindy. No matter how many times he’d tried to engage her in seemingly harmless conversations, she rebuffed him. He’d hurt her and it was killing him to think about that. When he saw Peter and Mindy running off to do things together, he couldn’t help but be jealous. That used to be them.

Danny sat in the break room eating a muffin and reading the paper. He was keeping to himself. It was what he did best lately. Suddenly Jeremy walked in and sat down at the table with Danny. Jeremy drummed his fingers on the table. Danny wouldn’t look up at him. He just wanted to sit and enjoy his muffin by himself. Jeremy wouldn’t take the hint.

“So Danny what have you heard around the office?” Jeremy questioned.

Danny glanced up at him before turning the page in the paper and looking back at it. “I don’t engage in office gossip if that’s what you mean.”

“I was hoping you had intel on the Mindy situation.”

Danny folded his paper quickly and looked up at Jeremy. “What Mindy situation?” He couldn’t keep his fears from getting the best of him. Had something happened to her?

“Well Peter was saying something about Mindy having a one night stand. At least that’s what it sounded like.”

Jealousy hit Danny like a ton of bricks. He cleared his throat. “That doesn’t sound like Mindy,” Danny choked out.

“I thought the same thing. Even with me it was way more than once. She must be having a hard time getting over Cliff…” Jeremy trailed off.

Danny couldn’t take it. He grabbed his paper and left the break room.

“Danny, your muffin!” Jeremy chimed. Danny just kept walking back to his office. His appetite was gone.

If Mindy was moving on, so could he right? Once they were both moved on maybe they could be friends again. Danny turned around to shut his door and saw Mindy walking toward reception with a patient and he couldn’t stop looking at her. It occurred to Danny that maybe he’d never be able to move on from Mindy.

 

**_He could have your humor but I don’t understand ‘cause he’ll never love you like I can, can, can…_ **

How could Mindy not see that Jamie was clearly in love with his best friend? She kept correcting him and Jeremy every time they assumed Jaime and Lucy were a couple. She kept making it seem like she had something to prove. But when Danny would look over at Jaime from across the table, the man was staring at Lucy the whole time. Danny could tell that Jaime was in deep. He felt bad for Mindy. He knew when Jaime inevitably left her to pursue Lucy, Mindy would feel ashamed again.

Lucy was certainly keeping Danny’s attentions, but he couldn’t help but wonder how Mindy didn’t see what he saw. When Jaime and Mindy parted ways with Danny and Lucy at the restaurant, Danny speculated what would happen.

Later, Danny looked at Mindy as they escaped from the weirdest scene in the world. She seemed as down as he had expected. He didn’t get it. She should have known. At the same time, he could see why she thought they were compatible. They had the same sense of humor and the man kept swearing he wasn’t in love with his best friend. Who could blame Mindy for believing him?

As Danny showed Mindy the little pizza place, he saw the woman who had been through a lot in the past few months. She seemed pretty calm for just being dumped. He looked around the place that reminded him of memories of his ex-wife. He and Mindy sat there eating terrible pizza as images flew unimpeded into Danny’s mind of him and Mindy at some future day on an actual date.

He knew that if he had been Mindy’s date tonight, he wouldn’t have behaved in any of the manor Jaime had. He’d have shown Mindy the good time she deserved. He didn’t know when the moment was that he started caring so much about Mindy’s happiness, but he did. He knew as he sat there exposing his past to her that he’d want to make her happy if he ever had the chance. It was a strange thing for him to be thinking about his friend, but Danny knew that given the opportunity, he’d make sure he loved her better than the train of schmucks she’d dated before.

 

**_Why are you looking down all the wrong roads when mine is the heart and the salt of the soul?_ **

**_There may be lovers who hold out their hands but he’ll never love you like I can, can, can…_ **

She laid on the couch and moaned in pain. Danny hurried back over with the hot water bottle and the bowl of ice cream he’d scooped her. She sat up and let him sit down before lying back down across his lap. He put the hot water bottle across her abdomen hoping it would help make her feel better. She greedily took the bowl of ice cream from him and smiled devilishly up at him.

“You aren’t even feeling bad are you? You just wanted me to get you ice cream,” Danny teased.

“If that was my game, it worked like a damn charm,” Mindy responded, laughing. Danny leaned down and kissed her head.

She took a bite of the ice cream and moaned again. “My God this is good.” She paused and snuggled in to Danny a bit more. “I think this is just what I needed. Ice cream and snuggles with my man.” Danny smiled and rubbed his hand up and down her arm.

Mindy ate more ice cream and then sighed. “You take such good care of me, Danny.” Danny just shrugged. She leaned up and met him for a kiss. “I love you, Danny.”

Danny paused just staring at her. She gave him a confused look. “That’s the first time you’ve said it.”

It was Mindy’s turn to shrug as she took another bite of ice cream. “You knew I did, Silly.”

“I know. It’s just nice to hear.”

Danny reached down and stole a bite of her ice cream. She half cackled, half screamed at him. “You’re stealing my ice cream? I might just take back what I said!” Mindy said indignantly.

“Nope. No take backs,” Danny replied, grinning. Mindy just shook her head and turned back to the TV, every now and then offering a spoonful of ice cream to Danny.

They were near falling asleep later that night when Mindy snuggled up against Danny and whispered against his neck, “I love you.”  

“I love you too,” Danny whispered back, kissing the top of her head. She couldn’t know how much he did. It had taken him years to figure out how much he loved Mindy and he had a feeling that was only going to grow.

 

**_He’ll never love you like I can, can, can._ **

**Author's Note:**

> What did you think? I'm obsessed with this song (and obviously Danny and Mindy). I couldn't help but notice little ways they overlapped! I'd love to hear your thoughts! :)  
> P.S. Everyone go listen to this song because it's great. 
> 
> And also, you can find me here: http://allmylovesatonce.tumblr.com/


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